The Poetry Place

March on

Monday, 7 March 2011 13:54:04
pupil droplets gather
run down the pane

no. try again

pupil droplet ones and twos
down the streets and lanes
gather into threes and fours
gradually form streamlets
which coalesce into brooks
and then into rushing burns
as the school gates are reached
pour in and swirl and whirl
and gradually pause, find their level
in the reservoir of class or hall
but this river is nothing compared
to the bursting of the banks
and the torrent which outpours
when the final bell sounds

that's better for a first splurge

but while I was thinking, I heard these words on Jaz24:

"if you must keep talking, please try to make it rhyme"
followed by the refrain
"cos your mind is on vacation
and your mouth is working overtime"

Wonderful!  Even better is the extended metaphor earlier in the song (by Mose Allison) which many a teacher might want to commit to memory:

"if silence was golden
you couldn't raise a dime
cos your mind is on vacation
and your mouth is working overtime!"

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